Oh to be haughty....

‘Mummy, is there a nappy on me?
‘Yes, baby’
‘Good because there’s a wee in it now’.

I wish I was aloof and neat. By neat , I mean I wish that lipstick stayed on my lips, and that eyeliner stayed in the general vicinity of my eyes, and that my nose didn’t go red everytime I so much as think of having a cappuchino, not ‘neat’ as in the way Americans say ‘cool’. (I also wish I didn’t use the word cool, but that’s a whole nother matter)
I wish that I was aloof. I wish that I had a vaguely enigmatic smile, rather than a huge puppy dog grin that shows too many teeth. I wish that I could just be pleasantly friendly to people that I have just met, and then drift off leaving them wanting more, rather than belly laughing right next to them and then sharing details of my menstrual cycle. Or rather lack of it, seeing as I’m still breastfeeding….
See what I mean?
My sister and I are in the same music/mothers group thingy. She does this little eyebrow raise, hand closing movement that means ‘OK, that’s enough, shut up now’ or she’ll say something along the lines of ‘Reel it in now, Missy’.
And I tell people that I wish I wasn’t so loud and OTT, which once again does nothing to boost my aloof stakes. Aloof people, or even people who are trying hard to be aloof do not broadcast the fact that they share too much. Again with the ‘see what I mean?’
‘Yeah, you do do that, don’t you?’ commented someone who’s sir name I don’t even know, recently. ‘I’ve noticed that’.
And me, being really really eager to please, guffawed a bit and agreed. My nose probably went red too.
Neither aloof, nor cool, Im afraid.